Yesterday was a really difficult day.
Yesterday was a real "eye-opener" (bad pun absolutely intentional) for my mental health.
I was at a very low point.
Each day is a struggle.
Each day gets harder.
I know this, but I don't have to accept it.
Alongside the obvious scars, (which one sensitive soul genuinely asked me: "is that mark from...have you tried to hang yourself...or..?") I was also rocking:
1.) An Uncomfortable eyepatch - which I'm wearing to remove one set of my double vision, in an attempt to avoid being run over or tripping due to having no depth perception... 2.) A chafing and restrictive solid hard plastic hand splint - to give some control back to my nerve damaged dominant hand... 3.) I completed my HOT LEWK using a walking stick - briefly is the plan, just whilst I get my confidence back to be able to walk without rebounding around like a pinball spider monkey on acid.
It has taken me the last 16 of my 36 years to admit it, but today I am reaching out for help and beginning Therapy.
I am very nervous about this prospect, because believe it or not - the person you see on here is an overly bubbly, positive-outlooking and brave caricature of the person on the other end of these words.
Once again I find myself getting up off the ground; but this time I am reaching out for that open hand and grasping it tightly back.
I am lucky in that I have an immense support circle built from my partner, my sister, my ex, my close friends, my medical teams and a large group of strangers from the World Wide T'Interweb - that I may never even meet but have kept me going in my darkest days.
Some people are not so fortunate
It's never too late to ask for help.
Your life is always more important than your pride. ∆
Look myself in the mirror, I say we gon' win
Knock me down nine times but I get up ten.
Yeah, but I get up ten.
Knock me down nine times but I get up ten, b*tch.
#getupten #respawn #therapy #mentalhealth
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