A part of self love consist of creating boundaries for yourself. Boundaries protect yourself and your space from the bullshit you are no longer willing to accept. Boundaries are a way of you telling yourself that you are important enough to dismiss any rubbish that has been lingering around you. Boundaries are a way of you letting yourself know that you hold yourself in the highest regard just as you would for your partner, children and friends.
Why do we find it so hard?
Because we always feel like we are doing an injustice to other people or we grip onto hope that things will change.
NEWSFLASH... things dont change unless YOU make the change.
Boundaries have never been my strong point. I create them in my head, probably start off strong for a week and then give in and fall off. This has happened in many instances and I only end up getting pissed at myself because I was the one who let things slide. Trust me I'm far from a pro at this. But when youfollow through with your boundaries it feels so good. I found it useful in havin that conversation with myself about why I need to create boundaries and how this will benefit me. Just to make sure I'm aligning within my integrity.
Is it just me that notices that when you put boundaries in place your whole attitude and vibe changes? Nah I'm serious! I noticed that when I put boundaries in place I was acting a bit stink towards the person or very shady towards a situation. Why was this?
Because I was trying so hard to keep those boundaries in place but the only way I knew how to do that was to go on like I was The Rock (from wrestling). And that within itself takes so much energy that naturally you will eventually give in.
And because I was rar vex that I had to put boundaries in place because that person didn't value me enough to fix the fuxk up.
TRUTH BOMB: really because I didn't value me enough to even allow it in the first place.
Lesson: place and sustain boundaries with love. Its that simple. And whenever you feel that whole Shaniqua vibe coming along.... pause and tell yourself your not driving on the m6 today. .
#boundaries #important #protectyourenergy #protectyourpeace
My first every blog! My dream day a year from now...
"I wake up next to my husband before the kids join us for morning snuggles. We light a candle at the table and enjoy a wholesome breakfast with a poem or a piece of artwork to chat about, really chilled. I leave Dan clearing up and the kids playing while I shower and dress. I kiss the kids and walk slowly through the garden, enjoying the sights, smells, sounds and textures of the season..."
What would you want for yourself and your family if there were no obstacles? In my blog post I share my dream day a year from now. Visualising the way we'd like things to be gets us half way there. We practice at being our future selves - the versions of us that live with more joy, ease, peace and connection with those we love. Read the whole blog via the link in my bio 💛💛💛
I was thinking this week about how positive my mental health has been recently.
I guess I could say I’ve got my ‘defences’ in place.
1. My work life balance is better than its ever been. I’m learning to enjoy my downtime and not be so obsessed with doing. Anytime I do too much my whether it’s too much work, too much training, too much of anything that gets me high, my stress hormones go haywire and anxiety kicks in 🙈
2. My support network. I’m an so lucky and grateful to be surrounded by so many amazing people who’ve totally got my back.
3. Training. Training for me is much more of a mental thing, the physical benefits are kind of a by product. Whenever I’m too much in my head, slipping into overwhelm or just plain stuck with anything, training shifts my mindset. It’s kind of like the restart button on a computer. After a good training session I can see clearly again. ————————————————— Things are far from perfect I def still have work to do on my ‘oversensitivity’ but keeping these ‘defences strong means I stay off the punchline and avoid slipping into stress and anxiety way more than I used to.
What defences have you got that stop life overwhelming you ? I’d love to hear.
Happy Friday 😃
Pic by the amazing @amycooperphotography
#positivementalhealth #boxing #stressmanagement #knowyourself #selfcare #girlswhobox #mindset #coach #womeninbusiness